Monthly Archives: May 2017

Judgement

Confession: Cub takes at least 12 medications a day. 

Why? Because that’s what he needs to be successful. 

Why is it a confession and not a statement? Judgement. 

I was refilling Cubs medication dispensers tonight when I said to Tiger, “I think people would judge us if they knew how many pills we give our child each day.” He replied “you are right. Maybe even report us.” And then I said “I keep it a secret because I’m embarrassed. I feel like it presents as poor parenting and I want to protect him and us from judgement.”

This is what it’s like to be an autism parent. While our child is navigating an uncharted path in the world, we are second guessing everything, ourselves included. We are constantly walking a tightrope of empowering and protecting our children. 

I don’t want people to see his explosive meltdowns. “I keep it a secret because I feel like it presents as poor parenting and I want to protect him and us from judgement.”

I don’t want people to notice his tics (mouth noises, tongue turning, etc). “I keep it a secret because I feel like it presents as poor parenting and I want to protect him and us from judgement.” 

I don’t want people to see his intervention tools (headphones, fidget tools, weighted vest, pull-ups, etc.). “I keep it a secret because I feel like it presents as poor parenting and I want to protect him and us from judgement.” 

I keep this blog anonymous. “I keep it a secret because I want to protect him and us from judgement.” 

I started this blog because I needed this blog 7 years ago. I needed someone who would be real, honest, raw, and forthcoming. So here it is: Cub’s medications

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